When your mom is mad at your dad, don’t let her brush your hair.
If your sister hits you, don’t hit her back; they always catch the second person.
Never ask your three-year-old brother to hold a tomato.
You can’t trust dogs to watch your food.
Reading what people write on desks can teach you a lot.
Don’t sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a tic-tac.
Potatoes really can’t grow in your ears, no matter how dirty they get.
Never hold a dust buster and a cat at the same time.
School lunches stick to the wall.
You can’t hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
Don’t wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
The best place to be when you are sad is in Granny’s lap.