Tag Archives: courage

Happy Birthday To Me!

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Well sweeties, I’m having a big birthday this week. I’m turning 75! Can you believe such a big number?!!

Never in my life did I ever imagine I would live to such a ripe age. I don’t feel 75, but that number – it is huge!

What is it about these large numbers that are so intimidating anyway?

When I think about my grandparents being in their 70’s – well they were ancient! In fact, some of them had already left this earth.

I remember them as being pretty physically unfit, sitting most of the time, somewhat forgetful but kind of funny and fairly cheerful. Now I’m still able to walk a lot, go camping, sew everyday and travel. I may sit more than I used to (at the sewing machine!) and may be a bit more forgetful, but I always get to my appointments and find my way home. I think I’m pretty funny at times and as far as cheerful, I’d say these are the best years ever!!

I’ve often been told I don’t look my age. I truly believe that’s a combination of genes, good skin care and inner joy. Some things I can control and some things I can’t.

I am determined to be the best matriarch of my family I can be. As the eldest female of an active growing family spread across several states, I have a job which I take very seriously. And am the only one who can do it. When I am gone, the next eldest female will take my place, but until then, it is me.

I must stay fit in body, mind and soul to do my job well. Gramps and I are the models and standards for the young ones. We have a lot of teaching and explaining to do in our lifetime.

There’s no slacking off allowed in grandparenthood. One is on duty at all times. And I love it that way.

I just had the chance to speak with all the grandchildren when they called to wish me Happy Birthday. What a wonderful time to catch up with al their activities, work, worries, goals, thoughts.

And I had all those grand chances to tell them how proud I am of them, how brave they are, what good choices they are making, how glad I am they are in my life and how much I love them – you know, all those things that Granny needs to say.

Isn’t it wonderful how my birthday becomes a time to shine a light on the grandkids? That makes it even more special for me! I love that!

All The Courage In The World

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What would you do if you had all the courage in the world? I can’t even imagine my world with no fear, no worry, no “what ifs”. I’m fairly bold but still . . . . .

I think my granddaughter Katie is a really brave girl. She faced bullies and mean kids every day at school and yet she kept going . . . . . every day!!! I think that is remarkably courageous.

She had low self esteem, anxiety attacks and depression, and yet she faced those bullies again and again and again. I can’t imagine where she got the strength as a twelve year old to do that. I’m still amazed by her. She is my hero!

She is now fifteen, in high school, is an amazing actress and has many close friends. She likes herself, is happy and the anxiety attacks are few. Life is good for her.

Now if I had no fear of anything . . . . . I might open a quilt store. But do I have the physical energy to run It?! I guess I could hire people to do all that for me. But it is a dream I’ve had.

I might also open a quilt museum. That way I could display all the quilts I long to own. I would really love to do that! Think how much I would learn about all those quilts. Mmmmmmmmm! Oh give me a minute here . . . . . I’m in my dream world.

Let me see . . . . . I think I would write a book. I think there is one in me but I’m too fearful to let it out or maybe it’s I think I’m not smart enough to write a really good enough book. I’m not sure what is stopping me. Lots of different fears all together, I guess.

Then I think I would become a life coach or a lecturer, of sorts. I have wisdom and advice to give. If I were braver, I would be more bold about it.

One other thing – I would have liked to have been an interior decorator, just because I love color and putting furnishings together. I really love filling up an empty room or house. And I adore living in a well decorated space.

Of course, to do all these things I should have started thirty or forty years ago. But at my age of almost seventy-five, with not all the courage in the world, I have only lived portions of my dreams.

I quilt in my sewing room almost everyday. I display quilts in my home and share them with friends and family.

I write a blog and newsletters for organizations I belong to. I love to write letters to family and friends that are long and meaningful.

I have lots of advice to share with friends and family whenever they ask.

I have decorated several homes in my life with great joy.

What a great life I’ve had, even being fearful, not so courageous and a bit meek.

How much grander it will be as I become braver and braver!

I can’t wait!!!!

Life Lessons From Children

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The older I get, the more I realize that children have some of the best answers to the basic questions of life.  They seem to instinctively know how to manage the twists and turns of everyday living.

With all my education, experience and wisdom, I have learned to look to a five-year-old for some of the wisest lessons in getting through life.

Here are my top ten favorites:

Play is the best medicine.  Children have the ability to play with anything, anytime.  It’s how they release their emotions and feelings.  It’s also how they heal themselves.

Take a nap when you’re tired.  Children can sleep anywhere, when they need to.  What a great gift is that!

Always greet your elders with a hug and a kiss.  This is good advice your whole life – no matter how old you are.  Grannies always love to be greeted this way.

Every day is a fresh start.  No matter what happens today, no matter how bad it is or who hurts them, tomorrow is always a new day to a child.  All is forgotten and everything is possible again.  Each morning is a clean slate.

Be courageous.  Sing out loud.  Dance to the music.  Children are not confined by fear of failure or shame.  They embrace life.

Laugh every day.  Children see silliness everywhere.  Look for the humor in your everyday life.

Be active.  Get up and move.   Go outside. Find something to do.  Contact a friend. Children rarely sit in a rocking chair staring into space, thinking about the past.

Scars are badges of honor.  Scars are sources of pride to children, not signs of weakness.  Be proud of your scars.  Tell the story.   Make yourself the hero.  Pass on the wisdom.

Try new things.   Children do not fear the unknown.  They will try a new game, dive into a pool or jump on a trampoline.  Be adventurous.  Get out of your comfort zone.  Step into the unknown.

Notice the little things.  Children can be fascinated by the smallest of things – ants crossing a sidewalk, the tiny feet of birds, the wings of a bumblebee.  The things we take for granted bring them great joy.  Take notice of all the small miracles around you, and see how much more beautiful your life will be.

Becoming more childlike is one of the wisest things we can do as we age.

Inappropriately Dressed

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The invitation said “casual” dress.  So Gramps and I took them at their word and arrived in jeans and T-shirts.  The only other couple we knew, besides the hosts, were also dressed as we were.

Everyone else had on slacks, blouses and button-down shirts.  We four looked like the country bumpkins of the group.

How did they know what “casual” meant?  How did we not?

At first, I was just embarrassed.  I felt I had somehow let our hosts down, that I had embarrassed them in some way.

Then the four of us began to be treated as if we were inferior to everyone.  As if we did not understand what they were talking about.  As if we were confused children.

Even our hosts were rude to us and shamed us in front of the others.  If it hadn’t hurt so much, I probably would have found it interesting what a difference our clothes made in that social situation.

Because we were underdressed, we weren’t allowed to fit in the group.  We were laughed at, ignored and talked down to – because of our attire!

By then, I was angry and wanted to leave.  But the other three of our little foursome didn’t want to give up so easily.  So we four formed our own small party.

We partook of the food, the drinks, the lovely home and our own companionship.  We found our own little spot and had a great conversation all to ourselves.

I have no idea what the rest of those people did or talked about.

But when Gramps and I left, we could honestly tell the hostess, “We had a great time!”

How I Learned To Drive

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When I was the appropriate age, about fifteen, I took the regular Driver’s Ed. class in school. It was regular then, not so much now.   But it was all book learning – no actual behind-the-wheel training.

So my dad took on the job of teaching me to drive.  I thought it would take a day or two for me to become a good driver.  Boy, was I in for a surprise!  To begin with, I learned to drive on a four-speed stick-shift – not easy.

First he took me to an abandoned shopping center parking lot to teach me to park.  Yes, the dreaded parallel parking!  He would stand at the end of one space, pretending to be the back end of a car.  I was then to park behind him – without hitting him!

Oh mercy sakes!  Figure out how to parallel park or kill your father!  And he never budged one inch – ever!

Then we would drive home on the freeway – of all things!  Believe me, I was thrown in the deep end of the driving pool.

But I did pretty good, until the day he had me drive all the way into the driveway.  Evidently I was getting too close to the garage door and he yelled, “Stop!!!!!!”  He startled me so badly I pressed on the gas instead of the brake.  We went through the garage door, damaged the brick surround, which fell on the washer and dryer, and the car, damaging all of them.

Sitting in the car with a garage door and bricks on top of me, I was in tears.  I cried, “I don’t believe this!”  “Oh, believe it!” he said in a very flat tone.

During the reconstruction of the garage, my friends asked what kind of renovation were we doing at our house.  I was too ashamed to say I had driven through the garage door.

I did get better and eventually was able to drive all the way home and park the car in the garage with no harm to house or car.

My dad was a good teacher and taught me everything I needed to know to take my driver’s test.  On the day of the test, the gentleman said my parallel parking was great and my freeway driving was very good.

The one thing I didn’t know and Daddy failed to tell me – don’t stop in a crosswalk.  Oops!

But I passed my test with flying colors and never ran into a garage door again.

The Best Things About Being A Woman

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Okay, I’ll admit it!  I’m a woman!  And proud of it!  Maybe I wasn’t always – proud, that is.

I remember wishing as a young chil that I could be strong like a boy and do some of the things the boys could do.  But age brings wisdom and now I bask in my womanhood.

I think women have so many options these days in so many arenas of life.  We can be gentle and strong, quiet and loud, a follower and a leader, a teacher and a student, a stay-at-home mom and a CEO.  We can be anything we can envision or dream.

Women are the heart and soul of the family. We set the mood and tone of the whole unit through our interactions with each individual.  As the old saying goes, “When mama’s happy, everyone’s happy.”

We are allowed, by society, a much broader range of emotions and emotional responses than men.  How refreshing it is to to be able to express ourselves in such a true manner and to know we have an arsenal of feelings at our disposal.

Women are blessed with the ability to bear children.  It’s a special gift given and should be viewed as such.  It creates a bond with a child that is unique in the world.  I wouldn’t trade motherhood for anything.

We women have a special bond with each other.  Having sisters in heart is a great privilege and great fun.  I can’t imagine getting through life without the support and love of my friends and fellow females.  We form the most wonderful little villages of interests, concern and hobbies, and build into forts of protection, help and family.

Women influence the world just by being who they are.  They don’t have to go through somebody else or be somebody else to make a positive mark.

Every good word I speak makes a mark.  Every good example I set makes a mark.  Every positive act I support makes a mark.

I am a woman and I love it.  I’m right where I’m supposed to be and doing what I have been charged to do – make a difference.

My Life Lately

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Things are so different right now, I am having trouble adjusting.  I used to have a full schedule.  I knew what I was going to do every day.  My calendar was black from written-in events for the month.

Now the calendar is blank white, my schedule is empty and every day I have to think about what to do with my time.  My life has completely changed on a dime with no preparation or warning.

Building a good day does not just happen on its own anymore.  I have to plan it.When I wake up, I have to decide this is going to be a good day.  Attitude is everything.

Taking it a day at a time can be too hard under the current stress.  It’s better to look at the short term and maybe take it hour by hour.  I find if I set very small goals, I do much better.  Being successful six times a day feels so good right now or even just twice is okay.

My sewing is giving me a lot of pleasure right now.  It is lovely to be able to touch and pet my fabrics at a time when I cannot touch others.  My sewing also gives me purpose and calms my mind.

I can be at my sewing machine for hours and not even realize how much time has passed. It’s good therapy for me in many ways.  Sewing helps me make a day good.

I’ve also found that what I look for, I find.  If I look for humor in my day, I usually find it.  The same with beauty, joy and peace.

Of course, if I set my mind on anxiety and stress, I will find that too.  It’s up to me.  It’s always up to me.

Even when I can’t hug them, my friends remain so valuable to me.  I try to stay in touch with them as often as possible.  I make a point to call someone every day.  And occasionally have group meetings online, when able.  Seeing friends’ faces is so precious.

And then there’s my sweetie, who makes everyday a joy.  He adds calmness, humor and logic to my life.  How blessed am I to have such a rock in my life.   He makes all things bearable and worthwhile.

So getting through these times will take planning, forethought and some organization. Keeping a positive attitude is the harder, but more important part.

I have to give it my all each and every day.  Each and every hour really.  But these are historic times.  Think of the stories I will have to tell in the years to come.