Questions I Wish I Had Asked My Parents

In this year of celebrating the 75th Anniversary of D Day and remembering all the years in our past, I have been thinking a lot about my parents. They have both passed on now and I have so many questions I wish I had asked them while they were still able to give me the answers.

My parents knew each other their whole lives. They were born in the same town four days apart. My mom was the youngest of all girls and my dad the youngest of all boys. My two grandmothers were in the hospital together and joked about how they should trade babies so they would have a different sex child in the family.

And those two babies grew up and got married. (I always thought that was a great premiss for a movie) So where are all the stories of growing up together? Going to school together? Seeing each other around town? Knowing each other forever? I wish I had asked.

And I don’t know exactly how they got married. They didn’t date in High School, so it must  have happened during WWII. I wish I had asked how my dad proposed and how they planned the wedding. Did they have a honeymoon? What did they wear? How did they know they were right for each other? I wish I had asked.

I wish I had asked what prompted them both to enter the service. My dad tried to enlist and found out he was color blind, which meant he could only go into the Seabees – Construction Battalion. My mother, believe it or not, was a Marine. I think she enlisted because of her sister Irene, who also joined the Marines. But why the Marines? I wish I had asked,

I wish I had asked them how they felt about the war. Were they ever afraid, confused, proud, ashamed or conflicted as an American? Were they glad to be in the Military? Sorry they joined? I wish I had asked.

I wish I had asked them how things were after the war. They were married and started having children right away. My dad was in college on the GI Bill. I think they were living in a mobile home park. Sounds like an “I Love Lucy” segment, doesn’t it? That couldn’t have been easy. But how did they manage? Was being a veteran a proud thing? How did they feel? I wish I had asked.

I wish I had asked them about their thoughts of early parenthood. My mother had three children in three years while my dad was going to school. And she had no family nearby. But I never heard the stories. Were they too horrible? Just forgettable? What? I wish I had asked.

How I wish I could sit down with both of them and ask these and other questions. When I had the chance, I didn’t think of it or it didn’t seem necessary. Now that it’s too late, I’m thinking of so many things only they can answer.

My advise to others – ask the questions NOW!! Don’t wait!! And if you are the elder in your family, write down all the stories for the younger ones. Don’t wait to be asked. Don’t wait until someone else thinks of it. Don’t wait for the perfect time. Just don’t wait Do it NOW. Because then it will be too late and they will say – I wish I had asked.

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That’s Funny!

A sense of humor can be a gift from God. It can also be taught. Almost every baby I’ve ever met had some sense of the funny and the silly.

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Being playful certainly helps develop that sense of whimsy. When my grandson Mac was about nine months old, he was sitting in his highchair with his sippy cup. He set the cup on the tray and carefully pushed it forward with a twinkle in his eye. I saw this and carefully pushed the cup back. Mac laughed with his whole body and then with one finger, pushed the cup toward me. We played this wonderful game for about ten minutes, pushing the sippy cup back and forth, laughing the entire time.

Believe me – children understand humor!

As kids get older, their sense of humor changes. Granddaughter Marie is deep into Knock-Knock jokes.  What is even funnier is when she forgets the punch line of one joke and goes straight into the next one. Hysterical!

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Then, of course, there is the period every child goes through when potty jokes and body parts are the funniest things going. Mostly this period is tolerated by adults rather than encouraged. But sometimes, I have to admit, the jokes can be funny and I can’t help but laugh.

Seeing the funny side of life is the best way to get through a day. The sillier, the better really. I can’t imagine a day in my life without laughter. Who could get through a good day, much less a bad day without some fun and joy? Not me, that’s for sure.

Letting children see you laugh and enjoy the little things around you is the best example ever. They learn more by what you do than by what you say. So I recommend you do both – talk about humor and demonstrate it.

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Decide each day to see the humor in the world, laugh at the silly things and enjoy the whimsical.

Decide each day to be the best example of good humor to others, especially the little ones.

Decide each day to encourage the children to laugh and embrace their own unique sense of the humorous.

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Decide each day to be happy!